I've been losing motivation lately. I don't know why. Maybe it has to do with my peers and a lack of connection with those around me. My own motivations for medicine don't seem to line up with those around me. It feels isolating sometimes and makes me wonder whether I was supposed to do this. My friends and family and loved ones and patients reassure me that I am, but what about myself? What does my heart say?
I had a conversation with a patient on the wards the other day. She was a woman with terminal lung cancer. She has COPD. She is alone, with no family to call her own. Her friends visit her when they can but their empathy seems to have worn thin. And yet, she is a wonderful, beautiful, optimistic person. She told me of stories of travels, of past loves and of loves that should have been but weren't. She is and was a person. A person. Gotta remember that. I'm here for the people and the sacrifices I've made to this point were made out of earnest.
This is why I'm in medicine. Remember and hold onto that. Eye on the prize... eye on the prize.